The Art Assassin 2

a nonfiction novel by Albert Wang, or a portrait of the artist as a young failure…

Buck Naked Is Not William Powhida Or Edward Winkleman!

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The Gunning Fog index that is used to determine the supposed identity of Buck Naked. Courtesy of Wikipedia.

Now that I had completed the three exclusive (or perhaps not) interviews with the three following subjects: Buck Naked, Edward Winkleman, and William Powhida, I decided to settle the score by conducting a lingustic analysis on their answers. So I went to analyze text content using the free text analysis tool (http://www.usingenglish.com/resources/text-statistics.php) which gave me statistics about a text including word count; unique words; number of sentences; average words per sentence; lexical density; and the Gunning Fog readability index.

The results that people have been waiting for:

BUCK NAKED ANALYSIS:

General:
Overall     Sampled
Characters (all):     1,421     530
Characters (words only):     1,066     408
Words:     249     100
Different Words:     142     71
Sentences:     50     20
Syllables:     346     136

Averages:
Overall     Sampled
Characters per Word:     4.28     4.08
Syllables per Word:     1.39     1.36
Words per Sentence:     4.98     5.00

Readability:
Overall     Sampled     Calculated Grading
Hard Words:     24     8
Long Words:     46     15
Lexical Density:     57.03 %     71.00 %
Gunning Fog Index:     5.85     5.20     Easy
Coleman-Liau Grade:     17.81     8.23     8th Grade
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level:     2.75     2.41     2nd Grade (-3 years)
Flesch Reading Ease:     84.22     86.70     Easy: 5th Grade
ARI (Automated Readability Index):     7.94     0.29     0th Grade
SMOG:     6.79     6.46     6 Years (Low-literate)
LIX (Laesbarhedsindex):     23.45     20.00     Very easy

EDWARD WINKLEMAN ANALYSIS:

General:
Overall     Sampled
Characters (all):     12,749     1,038
Characters (words only):     9,988     839
Words:     2,198     179
Different Words:     806     114
Sentences:     196     4
Syllables:     3,160     265

Averages:
Overall     Sampled
Characters per Word:     4.54     4.69
Syllables per Word:     1.44     1.48
Words per Sentence:     11.21     44.75

Readability:
Overall     Sampled     Calculated Grading
Hard Words:     232     20
Long Words:     477     43
Lexical Density:     36.67 %     63.69 %
Gunning Fog Index:     8.71     22.37     Hard
Coleman-Liau Grade:     18.36     11.81     11th Grade
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level:     5.75     19.33     19th Grade (14 years)
Flesch Reading Ease:     73.83     36.17     Difficult: High School or Some College
ARI (Automated Readability Index):     11.50     23.02     23rd Grade
SMOG:     8.96     15.25     15 Years (Some college)
LIX (Laesbarhedsindex):     32.92     68.77     Very difficult

WILLIAM POWHIDA ANALYSIS:

General:
Overall     Sampled
Characters (all):     17,604     557
Characters (words only):     13,912     439
Words:     3,151     106
Different Words:     1,082     76
Sentences:     218     6
Syllables:     4,422     140

Averages:
Overall     Sampled
Characters per Word:     4.42     4.14
Syllables per Word:     1.40     1.32
Words per Sentence:     14.45     17.67

Readability:
Overall     Sampled     Calculated Grading
Hard Words:     311     4
Long Words:     603     18
Lexical Density:     34.34 %     71.70 %
Gunning Fog Index:     9.73     8.58     Easy
Coleman-Liau Grade:     17.11     8.59     8th Grade
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level:     6.61     6.88     6th Grade (1 years)
Flesch Reading Ease:     73.44     77.17     Fairly Easy: 6th Grade
ARI (Automated Readability Index):     12.11     6.91     6th Grade
SMOG:     9.54     7.47     7 Years (Junior high school)
LIX (Laesbarhedsindex):     33.59     34.65     Easy

The supreme conclusion: Both Buck Naked and William Powhida write at an Easy Level whereas Edward Winkleman writes at a Hard level according to the Gunning Fog index. Therefore, Buck Naked <> Edward Winkleman and William Powhida <> Edward Winkleman. Thus we would need to conduct a further test which is the Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level that uses a different calculation than that of the Gunning Fog index. Okay, Buck Naked has a Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level of a 2nd grader whereas William Powhida has a Flesch-Kindcaid Grade Level of a 6th grader. I would like to conclude that there is no f–king way that Buck Naked could be William Powhida by this conclusion. To put this in layman’s terms, chatting with Buck Naked would be like reading Dr. Seuss, chatting with William Powhida would be like mic checking Adam Sandler crossed with Jaime Kennedy, and chatting with Edward Winkleman would be perusing Jacques Derrida on a good day and reading Art F– City on a day wasted by Becks. Shantih!

Quote of the day: “Someone contacted me on Facebook the other day and asked if I was Buck Naked from How’s My Dealing?. The answer is no. I would like to think that my enemies/allies lists and projects may have served as some sort of inspiration for Buck Naked, but I’ve learned to make my attacks on the art world part of my art…. So, I am not Buck Naked. It’s not my blog. I do think it’s an interesting bit of gossip and speculation, but without any verifiable sources, all the information remains just that, gossip and speculation. The fact that it seems to get so much attention is more indicative of how the art world operates than anything else. I would note that having been once again accused of being Buck Naked, (my own art dealer asked a few weeks ago), I stopped by the site today and scanned the death watch. Apparently back in October, someone said Schroeder Romero was closing. It’s not, unless they are just shielding me from the awful truth.” –William Powhida

Verdict: Buck Naked <> William Powhida <> Edward Winkleman. Transitive property in full effect.

For more gossip or dishing me the art scoop: E-mail me at qipengart@gmail.com
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Written by qi peng

May 16, 2009 at 11:28 am

Posted in Uncategorized

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